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I was reading your blog, and I had to write about my experiences in trying to meet and date tall girls, so as to offer a shorter male’s point of view.
When I was 24, I met a divorced woman, 32 who was 5’11”. I was 5’8”. It was a brief affair, but I just could not get over her long legs and curvy broad hips. She possessed a tapered waist which only accented her curvy hips ever further. Because of her, I developed an appreciation for long legs and the natural curvy hips of a tall woman.
I moved into a singles apartment complex in Houston. In this apartment complex, there was a loose knit group of single men and women. In this singles group was Heidi, 5’11”, early 20’s, blonde hair and blue eyes. I remember one time she was standing before me at the complex pool, while I was sitting in a chair. She was wearing a white 2 piece bikini. I looked up through her long tanned legs to those broad hips, and my memories came back. Anyways, in the few times we talked, she never expressed any interest in me, so that was that.
One Saturday, during the summer while at another pool in the same complex, I was chill’en with 2 or 3 other guys, when another man I knew walked up to us and mentioned that he had proposed to Heidi. She had turned him down, and he wanted anyone in the group who knew here, to put a good word in with her, for him. To say the least, we were all stunned that a guy would say this to a group of acquaintances. A few months later, while at my pool, I overheard two girls talking about Heidi turning down two other men. I do not know if these girls were talking out of envy or were mocking the two men, but this showed that Heidi was getting the attention of men. (Fast forward 12 years, one child and one divorce later.) A friend of mine wanted me to join a singles dating organization. I said before I join, I want to see what some of the girls in the organization looked like. He obtained about 20 biographies with photos of the women. It must have been photo 8 or 9, but there was Heidi. Her name appeared on the top of the page, with her photo below and two paragraphs about her life. I remember this one phrase, 34 years old, never married, no children.
I thought, how could this be? If she were not the most desirable girl in a social gathering, she certainly was one of the more desirable girls. Three men offered to marry her, and there must have been more. And this made me think about my own personal experiences with tall women. As I went back in time, I remember two girls telling me they wanted a taller man. One girl, in a gym, talked to me with such a look of disinterested she couldn’t have looked more uninterested if she had wanted to, another girl I approached looked at me as if I had insulted her for even talking to her. On line, I met a girl 5’11”, and we worked out together once in my apartment complex gym, after that she did not return my two phone calls, there could be others, too. Now, you may say the rejections were because of my looks, that could be true, but as I approached girls closer to my height, my success rate went way up.
This blog made me think about the rejections by tall girls, and it angered me, but not at the time the rejection. Only years later, when I actually tallied them up, for this letter, did I get angry. I was rejected not because I was ugly or had a rotten personality or other bad traits. No. The reason I was rejected by all of these women was my height, as if you can measure a man’s character or worth by using a yardstick. Not one even bothered to put forth the effort to get to know me much less date me.
I am now married, with sons 11, 7 and 3 along with a son 22 from my first marriage. I am a good father and husband. I give my boys attention and time. They have electric motorcycles, pedal carts, bikes and all sorts of video games. I have traveled to 22 counties and 20-30 states across the US. I have 3 degrees, and I have co-authored a US patent. I have made over 6 figures for 10 plus years. I could have provided a good life to any girl. I wanted a taller girl because of the physical turn on and to for fill one of my desires, yet not one single tall girl (20’s) gave me a chance. I was turned down consistently without a second thought.
So, if you find yourself in your late 20’s or early 30’s with no prospect of a husband or children in the immediate future, you have no one to blame but yourself, just as Heidi discovered. There were men like me, who wanted a leggy female, but they, like me, were never accorded the opportunity. And the reality is that the vast majority of tall women will not even consider a shorter man until it is too late. You would think it would be obvious that if you included shorter males in your suitor selection, your odds would increase of finding a mate. There are a lot more short and medium height males than there are taller ones. So my advice would be to accept the advances of men and get to know them. I, who would have relished the opportunity of having curvy broad hips and a tapered waist to hold all night and to make love to into the early hours of the morning, was never, not once, even given a chance to start a relationship. Throw away the yardstick, for you may find someone like me, who would love to share his life and love with a tall girl.
I would say that there is something biological about a woman's desire for a taller man, just like there is probably something biological about what seems to be most men's desire for a smaller woman.
I'm a 6'1" woman, and was not bad looking at all as a young woman (I'm 57 now). But no..... I was chased by men half my size. I don't really like feeling twice a man's size. My current partner is a lot shorter, and he's handsome and well built, and he's very good company--but if I had my heart's desire, I would have wanted a man closer to my own size.
I've dated several men shorter than me. I don't *have* to have a man taller than me. But for pure physical attraction, I prefer them at least up around eye level.
There's also the issue of what you're used to. We really big Amazons are not used to being around that many men who make us look small. I did go out with two men in the range of 6'8" and 6'9". Neither relationship went anywhere. The taller guy actually told me stories which made him sound like something of a control freak, so I didn't go out with him again. The other guy picked me up as if I were a feather (I was only 22 years old at the time). I am not used to that, nor am I used to being with men where I only come up to their shoulder. I was a bit intimidated by that guy because of it.
I've taken an informal poll of other tall women I have met over the years. Just about every last one of them told me that they had also grown up watching the tiny women and the big men get together, and they couldn't figure out why big men preferred tiny women, and why tiny women weren't happy with guys who were in the range of 5'7" to 5'10"--a lot of these pipsqueak women insisted on dating only men in the 6'6" range... they claimed that they couldn't get turned on otherwise.
After all, if a woman is only 5'1", a guy who is only 5'7" is still 6 inches taller than her. I have spoken to several much shorter men and they all seem annoyed (to say the least) about this. They were, like you, good-looking, accomplished, etc.--but the tiny women wanted men who were well over 6 feet.
I will say that I am not comfortable with a guy who is so much smaller than me that he looks like a kid next to me instead of a lover. Sorry, but that's the way it seems to me.
I will say that I have personally gotten better responses from men who are under 6 feet tall themselves.
I just have to say that PLENTY of tall women have been rejected "just because of" their height. In my mother's generation, women my size or taller often ended up single for life. All because guys wouldn't consider us.
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